day 2

Everybody is stressed. I might not have realized this in my previous time working here. It's not easy accepting the fact that you have an incurable disease. That you are stigmatized by society for it, regardless of how you contracted it, not that that should matter anyway. For gay men who have contracted AIDS, it's a double stigma in our society, even among some gay men.

Massage #4

I don't remember working on him before but I know he used to come frequently for massages. Back when I worked here before, there were six more or less full-time massage therapists. Sometimes seven. And an acupuncturist. Not many stories here. Bulked up guy. Good shape. Has lifted weights for years. Not sickly at all. But he can't sleep and Xanax and Ambien make him act weird, so he doesn't take them anymore. He lives in a vicious cycle. Hopefully the massage might help him relax today and sleep better tonight.

Massage #5

Another no-show but I am assigned a resident I used to work on every now and then. I'm not sure what's true or not of what he tells me. Has he been a resident here all this time or not? I probably need to verify. He tells me today that he was recently living at his sister's house. She has a good job at a local large company but as he tells me, she stays out late every night.  He stays home and watches her children. She told him he had to provide all of his own food. So when he arrived, so he says, he bought a lot of food but ate it all and then forgot to get more food. I asked him if he was responsible for feeding the kids at night since his sister was out, and he said yes but that they eat cereal for dinner. So he stopped eating. He forgot.  He started losing a lot of weight and then his body began to shut down so he was brought back here. I definitely remember him being more stout. He's thin now. Lost all his muscle. Very nice guy. Walks on his own, appears seemingly well. He brought me a bottle of water after the massage from his personal refrigerator. He told me his mother was coming to take him to lunch at the Olive Garden. He was excited to go out and get a really good meal. He will be a good candidate to massage when there is another cancellation or no-show. 

Massage #6

"I'm a 60-year-old queer with AIDS" was how he responded when I introduced myself and asked him how he was doing. He didn't mean it in an aggressive or antagonistic way at all. Actually said it very good-naturedly. We had a very nice session in fact. He lives with another client of this facility. They walk a lot and do housekeeping together.