day 8

I did not have very many conversations today. It depends on several factors I guess. As usual, there was one no-show or cancellation so I picked one of the residents there that I used to massage occasionally before, and recently returned to live there. Then the next two were a couple, which is fairly commonplace. I have worked on either several couples of clients here already, or at least one member of a couple, further demonstrating that we humans always seek companionship and that typically we find it within some sort of particular group. I know, not always. 

In this case, HIV/AIDS, for very logical reasons, also participate in this trend. After all, you have all of this additional knowledge and perspective on the condition and the medical care services which could benefit each of you more than struggling through it all alone. A built-in mutual support system. One member of a couple who is not infected has a steeper learning curve and perhaps cannot relate to the same degree, though there is no limit to the love and compassion we can show for each other and that has been demonstrated in many instances of people with illnesses and their healthier partners.  But still, in the face of a society who already stigmatizes homosexuality, being homosexual and hiv positive, is one more additional weight to bear and it can rear its ugly head at any moment, obtrusively or not.

Massage #22

I remember this man from before. He had suffered a stroke a number of years ago. I have always enjoyed working with people who have had strokes. One of my earliest private clients who I worked with weekly for several years experienced a stroke on her honeymoon. She was in her 30s if I remember correctly. It greatly affected one side of her body and impaired her ability to communicate verbally. It was fascinating but gratifying. The relationship between the brain and the body is, let's be real, insane. Yes, that's a good word for it. I mean, let's be real, it's like a computer, electrical impulses and all, but a computer you can always fix if something goes wrong -- especially if it is mechanical. 

We do not yet understand the brain fully. I think great strides have been made in treating strokes. But how can one accept the fact that a portion of your body has been rendered useless because of some malfunction in your brain? We're not talking severed spinal cords from an automobile accident or a fall. 

And yet, almost magically, sometimes use is regained. Does the brain heal itself? And if so, how do we retrain those muscles and body parts to work again as they are supposed to?

This client is a happy guy. I did not remember him being in a wheelchair before. I am almost positive that he wasn't. Even early in the morning as several of the residents congregate in chairs around the nurse's station, most of them in wheelchairs, he is there joking around, although his verbal skills are somewhat impaired as well. I remember trying to get the affected arm to respond. 

I, for one, maintain that the most effective treatment for the effects of a stroke is lovingkindness. My intention is to heal. Somehow. Regain full use. It's all attitude and then, perhaps pluck. Or attention. Trying to sense how the body wants to respond, trying to draw a connection between the brain and that appendage. Creating a pattern of movement. Perhaps better said, recreating it. 

So mentally, this client is not all there. But he truly exhibits for lack of better term a joie de vivre, perhaps not even cognizant of his condition. I could ask the nurses I suppose. But at the same time, he is somewhat fastidious about his appearance commenting on what kind of haircut he would like, how his sideburns should look, etc. He fixed his hair as I helped him back into his wheelchair. As he put his feet up, he cleaned off his Crocs with his good hand. He felt very pleased and thanked me. 

Massage #23

I did not note much about this client. He was quiet. He massages his "friend" who was scheduled to be my next client and actually has investigated going to massage school, yet -- he's never had a professional massage before. This client is a professional waiter who has worked for twenty-three years at two of the best-known eating establishments in town. I don't even remember what transpired during the massage. Uncharacteristically, I did not even write down what I did. But at the end, he said "God, it feels good." That'll work for me. That's nourishment from generosity on his part. 

Massage #24

The friend of my previous client. I did not write almost anything about him either, though I did note that he had open sores all over his back. Again, I only recently learned, this is due to the medications. Several cause the skin to itch. This client also had extensive back surgery and had screws and plates all the way across his back. Yikes. The term he used was "anchored." I have no idea but I think I pushed too hard on one spot where one of the plates was located.